Why Doing It Yourself Doesn’t Work



I’ve always been a do-it-yourselfer (not sure if that’s even word). Fiercely independent, and at times stubborn, I always wanted to do things on my own. In the past it was difficult for me to ask for help. I always believed I could do it myself. Then along my journey I realized that trying to do it alone makes it much more difficult than it needs to be.

A part of me still thinks it’s true that you can do anything yourself, but the other part knows there’s a true power and a greater outcome when you ask for help. Let’s face it, there are areas where we all struggle and while we can push through on our own, we gain much more by asking for help.

I have realized within myself and with my clients most of the difficulty in the help equation comes on the receiving end. It feels awkward to receive help when you are used to doing it alone.

I see this in some of the people who ask to do a consult with me.

They know they need help, but they won’t commit to getting help.

From money to time, they have all kinds of reasons that they believe they should just do it alone.

Here are two things I see in my clients who are successful:

The #1 reason people succeed is because they trust themselves enough to ask for help. They know that they have the ability to make things happen regardless of what external circumstances look like.

The #2 reason people succeed is that they are willing to be transparent.


What I have learned is that being totally transparent is not about being a victim and overwhelming people with your junk. It’s about being honest with where you are at and what you need. And when you let go of that “I can do it all alone” mentality, you gain a sense of confidence with the fact that you can have faults or difficulties and it’s okay.


That’s the energy that resonates most with people. When you DIY, that energy becomes stuck and so do you.

Ask yourself the following questions:

1)     Are there things in my life that bother me that could be alleviated if I asked for support from my colleagues?

2)     Is there a need in my relationship that is not being filled because I am not asking for what I want?

3)     Am I not accomplishing a goal that I have dreamed of because there are parts of it that are too overwhelming?

I am sure you can see yourself in at least one of these three questions.

And I can help you!

If you feel brave enough, share your journey with me here, I’d love to hear about it :)

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