Why Are You Hiding?

I’ve been hiding most of my life.

I hid behind my marriage and perfect looking life. I hid by my ability to make sure I always said the right thing. I hid by not engaging in conflict when it was necessary because I didn’t want to look like the bad girl.

I hid behind books, isolation and other activities that would keep me away from people.

I never asked for help.

And honestly nobody thought I ever needed it.

I was so damn scared of being vulnerable I just pretended that I was OK all the time. My standard answer was I was “FINE”.

But inside I was full of anxiety and indecision. I had bad habits of self sabotage and really didn’t know how to practice any self-love. I kept attracting the wrong kinds of people in my life and replaying all of the bad parts of my childhood. When I wasn’t replaying the bad parts, I was spending time with people who were nice enough but emotionally distant.

It was very lonely.

Then my life kind of fell apart but in a very organized way. I didn’t hit rock bottom financially, but emotionally the universe separated me from any level of security I had. Before I was alone but still surrounded by people I couldn’t connect with. Then suddenly I found myself really alone.

Being really alone made me realize how much I’ve been hiding in my life. How afraid I was to be vulnerable and look less than perfect to anyone. It was OK for them to be in imperfect but I had to hold it together.

Can you imagine how damaging this was on my mind, body, and soul? If you’re reading this I’m sure you can. Because you’ve probably been there too.

There is a way out and it starts with opening yourself up to others without fear. It starts by asking help and not worrying about winning anyone’s vote. I had to ask for help from people who clearly disapproved of what I was doing in my life. But I learned not to care because at that time I needed a level of support from them.

I learned to detach from what they thought of me. I learned to allow them to have their own opinions and do their life their way. And guess what? Our relationship got better!

I plain out just stopped caring. Which helped me stop hiding. Which has been the greatest blessing ever.

So are you hiding? Are you ready to come out and be vulnerable in the world?

Start out with a small step each day opening up yourself up in way you wouldn’t have before.

Get help from a coach or a counselor to help you work through issues that may be holding you back. This is the one thing you will not regret doing. When you finally free yourself from a pattern of self sabotage and isolation you will really be free and will come back to yourself.

Do you need help being vulnerable?

I’m offering a free 30 minute session to the first five people who respond to this email. You can ask me anything about how to open yourself up or stop self-sabotage.

If you think you may be interested or just want to find out more about it, e-mail me at Laura@goodgirlshealth.com or schedule a session here


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